The Smart Retard Wears His Shoes Wherever He Wants

Smart.
I am smart.
Riddle me this: What goes on four legs in the morning, on two legs at noon, and on three legs in the evening, and is not smart?
If you want the answer to that, look in the mirror. Take a long look. Look at how not smart you are. It hurts doesn't it.
I'm tired of talking about you and how not smart you are.
I'm talking about shoes. Shoes in the house and shoes out of the house. No difference to me. I where shoes where I want to. On the carpet. In the bathtub. On your face. I walk through rain puddles, splashing and the like, making my shoes wet and muddy. Then I walk on my mom's carpet. She has a Bissel. She can take care of it.
When I was born I was wearing shoes. That's true. I wear shoes while getting a pedicure. Not true. I never get pedicures. I do my own clipping and filing. My toes are amazing. Yours aren't. You have horrible foot fungus and Athlete's Foot. You need to start wearing flip flops in the shower, especially since you started playing intramural racquetball at the Rec Center, which you are terrible at, btw. Btw means by the way. I know you didn't know that. Not smart.
Most Asian countries take their shoes off when entering the house. I don't. I wear shoes in the house because I don't want people to see my hairy feet. And I like the grip and performance of the Vibram sole. All of my shoes have the Vibram sole. Yours don't. You wear Voits. Shannon Spomer used to wear Voits. He never achieved his full potential in athletics because he lacked the grip and performance of the Vibram sole. In his defense the Vibram sole didn't exist then. What's your excuse?
Not smart.
I'm not allowed in most Asian homes anymore. Some take no shoes in the house very seriously. Most do. Some yell loudly. I'm not sure what they are saying. Not good, though.
Maybe not the most smart thing to wear shoes in Asian homes. Still not as not smart as you. Naturally.
What did we learn? You're not smart. Shannon Spomer prefers Voits. I like precision traction and agility that only comes from the Vibram sole. Smart.
Smart.
I am smart.
I am the smart retard.